camppetoskey | post-trial garbage feelings

post-trial garbage feelings

[ The campfire is still roaring. S'mores supplies are hanging around the area. There's still a faint scent of copper on the air, for those who can really recognize it.

Leon is leaning against Mami on one of the logs around the fire. He's been acting like he's uncaring-- and a lot of it stems from bitterness that this happened to him and he had to watch it AGAIN. But he's calmed down now. He actually looks rather peaceful, if a bit weathered.

There's also now a pizza sitting on another nearby seat. It's cheese and a little cold. ]

Spell didn't work. Delivery man practically blinked out of existence. I thought I'd try since... look at all of us now.

[ That's all he murmurs. Join the campfire? ]

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Mmm... so they are forgotten and thus they forget themselves, forget what it is to be human? That's... [He closes his eyes, thinks of Dino, lost for so long, not even allowed to die because who could brave the swarm in Galdin?] ... tragic.

[He breathes out a slow breath, pushes the ever present sorrow down, away, back to where it's safe until he has time to process it later.]

That's quite the ability, setting souls to rest. You carry a heavy burden but also a great honor. [He's not from Ichigo's world but he's gathered that things are a bit complicated, something similar to Usagi and Sailor Moon. It's not something he can just tell people. So Talcott reaches out, settles a hand firmly on his shoulder, a light squeeze and his thumb strokes gentle circles over his collarbone.]

Thank you. I may not be from your world, your Earth. But... thank you, for looking after those we've lost.

Uh-

[He pauses in mid breath as Talcott places his hand on his shoulder - but it's the collarbone rubbing that suddenly makes him blush, face going as bright as his hair for a moment before he frantically looks away.

He's not used to people touching him in such an intimate way, and he...doesn't really know how to respond. Sure, he's reached out to others, placing a hand on their shoulders when he felt like they needed it, but...this feels different.]

I-It's - fine! Just fine!

[He's babbling, but Talcott took him so off guard that he barely manages to remember what they were talking about before the touching happened.]

I-It's...normal, you know? Worrying about others - it's nothing to thank me over. I'm - just doing what anyone would do, if they could see the dead and do something to help them - that's all.

[Talcott watches the way Ichigo's mannerisms change, the shift in his expression, the color flooding his face. His face falls and he reluctantly draws his hand back. Ren's explained it a bit but it still doesn't sit right with him, so many opportunities to offer comfort, to do what he can to help and they all seem to be blowing up in his face.]

I... shouldn't have touched you. I'm sorry.

[And it's strange how much that hurts. It was the one thing he always had back home, the comforting warmth of another's hand, the pressure of someone sitting beside him, Ignis or Gladio, Iris, Aranea, Cindy. It was a way to remind yourself and those around you that you're not alone, no matter how dark the night.]

Not just anyone would do that. Give yourself a little more credit, Ichigo.

...!

[Even through his own flustered emotions, he can tell when someone's hurt - feeling rejected due to his own actions. He's felt that way before, when he's said something that's hurt someone more than he ever wanted - and he quickly puts his hands up in a 'hang on' gesture.]

N-No - it's not your fault. I'm just... not used to people touching me like that. I, uh - back home, normally you don't...

[He trails off, feeling foolish before sighing hard and rubbing the back of his neck, looking concerned.]

...Look - I'm sorry if I made you feel weird, or...something. I know you didn't mean it like that - you were trying to help, right?

I appreciate it.

[He smiles a little, if sheepishly.]

Just, uh...give me a warning beforehand, alright? It's been years since someone tried to comfort me like that.

[For a moment, his expression looks...painful, like he touched on an old, half-healed pain...but then it bounces back to normal.]

...Anyway, I don't think it's right to be thanked for doing the right thing, you know? That's why it's the right thing. It'd be like thanking me for protecting my sisters, or Kon - The older siblings are born first to protect them, so...

Ren was just trying to explain to me how different things are where you're from. You'd think I'd learn. [A soft, self deprecating laugh.]

It's... things are too hard, back home, to deny yourself the simple comfort of knowing that you're not alone. For the brief moments when you aren't, anyway.

[That expression, the flicker of pain and the admission that he doesn't get that sort of comfort only makes Talcott want to offer more, a hug, a shoulder to lean on. Anything to ease the redhead's burden.

But what he says after earns a similar expression from Talcott. Pained and sharp, clearly much fresher than whatever Tal had touched on for Ichigo.]

You sound like Gladio... [Gladio... Shield of the king who had protected him as though he was family and not just a servant. Who was probably lying dead in the ruins of Insomnia along with his King. It had been so long now. Had the Dawn come? Had he missed it?

And how high was the price? He thinks of what Ignis told him, of Noctis pinned to the throne like some morbid butterfly by his own father's sword. Of Lilith tossed through the air like a rag doll. Of Lenka and the disease that eats away at him even now.

Why was there always a price?]

I'll... try to remember to ask first. [And if he hadn't just pushed so far past Ichigo's boundaries he might've asked for a shoulder to lean on himself.]

No, seriously - it's alright. It's just...culture, you know? I've heard some people from my country who go over to France go into shock over how different it is there.

[But he listens to the rest, quietly. Things too hard back home to keep that distance, him reminding Tal of this Gladio -

He knows that look, more than he can really say. That look of loss and pain, just without the time needed to dull it.

He sighs, quietly, before giving a smile that...seems, if not more genuine, more true to himself than he lets most people see. A true smile, instead of his guarded ones.]

...That being said, uh...I don't mind if you need to lean on my shoulder, or something. Now that - you know, I know.

[And he - awkwardly - bumps up against Tal's shoulder, keeping the contact.]

Some people said the same about Altissia... All romance and-

[But Altissia's gone now. Everything's gone but as horrible as it is it didn't matter because they had hope.

And now he's here... he'll never even get to see the Dawn.

It startles him a little when Ichigo nudges him. He looks over at him, smiles softly, and leans back into him. Nothing more than just using Ichigo to support him a little, tipping his head to rest it on Ichigo's shoulder.]

You know you don't have to do this if... if it makes you uncomfortable.

[But you know he's not going to move until Ichigo asks him to. They've lost too much for him to want to be alone right now.]

It's fine. I get it, you know? After everything...sometimes, you just need someone to remind you you're not alone.

[He stares at the fire for a moment, before sighing.]

You just do it differently than I do - and that's alright.

[He can't blame someone for their coping mechanisms, honestly. His own was the spiky, harsh mask he wears over his sensitive insides.]

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post-trial garbage feelings

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