[ This is too much. Boa doesn't think he's ever been this pathetic in his life. He's never felt smaller or dirtier.
They made this promise. They promised.
And he's been too much of a fool to keep it. He could've let Chuuta die in his place, but the eyes of the others... The looks they gave him. Friends make you weaker. They'd told him in the Snake Pit. He'd known that.
And now he's going to die because he had friends. And he won't be able to keep his promise to the strongest boy he's ever known, to the person who made him feel so safe that his heart could almost burst.
This isn't how it was meant to go. This isn't what his life should be like.
But if he's going to die here and now and if he's already disgraced himself too much to ever return from it then... then he doesn't have to fight it when his body wants nothing more than to fall forward and rest his forehead on Mitsuru's shoulder. ]
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They made this promise. They promised.
And he's been too much of a fool to keep it. He could've let Chuuta die in his place, but the eyes of the others... The looks they gave him. Friends make you weaker. They'd told him in the Snake Pit. He'd known that.
And now he's going to die because he had friends. And he won't be able to keep his promise to the strongest boy he's ever known, to the person who made him feel so safe that his heart could almost burst.
This isn't how it was meant to go. This isn't what his life should be like.
But if he's going to die here and now and if he's already disgraced himself too much to ever return from it then... then he doesn't have to fight it when his body wants nothing more than to fall forward and rest his forehead on Mitsuru's shoulder. ]
I wanted to... I wanted to so badly...